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WH AT AM I S U P P O S E D TO F E E L ?
W
hat we feel is related to our way of see-
ing what happens to us in the world. If
what just happened is an attack that
made us lose our confidence in others, and in their
goodness, then it is normal to feel anger. If we inter-
pret that it will not be easy to overcome this, and that
things have no hope of improving, then it is logical
that we feel sad and hopeless. If what happened dis-
torted our beliefs about the world, we may feel that
this is no longer our world. If what happened makes
us see dangers and threats everywhere, we will so
feel anxious that we will be under the impression that
this feeling will never stop. This is what our emotions,
or lack thereof, will be like: another reaction to our
interpretation of what happened, and a way to cope.
•
It is normal to feel hate and anger, to feel betra-
yed, misunderstood, abandoned, unsafe or suspi-
cious,
among many other intense negative emotions
related to others, who will be no longer trustworthy
in our view.
•
It is normal to feel sad, hopeless and apathetic
in
a world that is no longer interesting or trustworthy,
and is a place where there is no hope for a better
future.
•
It is normal to feel anxious and fearful
of what
may happen, since the world has become a threate-
ning place, where at any moment everything impor-
tant may be lost without any reason.
•
It is normal to feel more irritable and impatient
at
people close to us, as a result of living under stress
for such a long period.
•
But it is also normal that we feel unable to feel,
weep, or suffer proportionately to what happe-
ned, as if we were infused with a sort of emo-
tional anesthesia
that prevents us from mourning,
that shocks us, or even frightens us, but this is no
more than a normal protection mechanism to pro-
tect our mind by blocking those feelings, thus sparing
us from suffering excessively. It is expected that the-
se emotions gradually fade away, although they may
arise once again when signs recalling the situation
reappear. These may include odors, noises, speci-
fic times of the day, activities, people, memories or
images.