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Choose 3 or 4 moments during the day to practice
these exercises consistently and regularly to lower
your overall levels of activation and automate this
skill, so that you can use whenever you find yourself
in a stressful situation
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After your first attempts, it would be advisable to
carry out the exercise in stressful situations
Speak in a more positive way to feel better
We talk to ourselves all the time, although we usually
don't pay much attention to what we tell ourselves.
Our internal dialogs are closely linked to our feelings
and our way of acting.
If we tell ourselves: “I'm going crazy, my life is spoiled,
I'll never enjoy anything or anyone”, we will feel really
bad, scared, sad, and hopeless, and may not even find
the strength to drag ourselves out of bed or go out.
But if we change this dialog to: “These reactions are
very unpleasant, but they are normal, and I will gra-
dually recover. I may not be the same, but I want to be
better than I am now,” we may feel more hopeful and
willing to do something to get by.
The phrases we tell ourselves determine what we feel
and do. So, whenever you need to face a stressful si-
tuation, use words in a more positive way:
HOW CAN I TALK TO MYSELF IN A MORE
POSITIVE WAY?
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If you are in a situation that makes you feel bad,
use positive instructions in your internal dialog
to not worsen the situation. You can tell yourself:
“Everything will be fine”, “it will be an unpleasant
moment but it’ll go away”, “I will be OK, I’ve gone
through worse”, “there's no need for perfection,
but I will do my best”, “maybe I’ll learn something
from this”, etc.
•
Try to direct your dialog towards your goals, to
what you want to achieve in that specific situa-
tion. You can tell yourself: “The important thing is
to heal the wounds and that’s what I'm here for.”
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Try not to focus your dialog so much on your emo-
tions or in how you are or not by telling yourself:
“I'm a coward, I'm getting sick, I'm going to faint.”
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If the feeling of discomfort continues, try to fi-
gure out if you are maintaining a negative dialog
with yourself: “I'm going to be sick”, “I will not be
able to do this”, “I'm not good at this”, and if so,
try to lead your dialog to a more positive place.
•
When you know in advance that a situation will
generate discomfort, focus on your internal dia-
log before going through it, as it will be easier for
you to establish a positive dialog from the begin-
ning.
•
After going through it, spend some time ack-
nowledging your success, and feeling proud for
what you accomplish: “I did it”, “It took me a lot
of effort but I did it, I am brave, I am capable of
many things.” Focus on your achievements, even
when you don’t fully succeed.